The Bachelorette- Who is the Aggressor, Emily or the Men?

I don’t know if any of you are into the Bachelorette this season, but I am obsessed. I have not missed one episode and definitely think Emily made a horrible decision in sending home Shawn. Jef is such a little kid and Arie is pretty phony, but that’s just my opinion. Okay, I’ll slow down a bit. For those of you who don’t know much about the show or have no idea what it is and what I am talking about, I’ll provide you with a brief description. If you’d like, you can actually go to the following link and watch the first episode to get a basic idea: http://abc.go.com/watch/the-bachelorette/SH5556990/VD55201748/week-1 .

Anyways, the Bachelorette is a spin-off of the original American competitive reality shows the Bachelor. This season features a gorgeous lady named Emily who hopes and believes she will find her new soul mate out of the 25 fortunate men that were chosen. While Emily is doing what “every” women is portrayed to do – be in a relationship and find love – she is also portraying something that would be considered inappropriate for  her gender norms.

I feel I could relate this show to Ward’s (1995) article Talking About Sex: Common Themes About Sexuality in the Prime-Time Television Programs. I would briefly like to focus on how Ward depicted male and female sexual roles:

-                    The Men – male sexual roles: I feel like the male roles that are depicted in the film – males as the aggressor – are fairly accurate with Ward. The men are the ones who are competing and trying to win Emily over; therefore, she is the ultimate prize (“trophy wife” as Ryan, one of the contestants, described her as). This shows the male gender role of being the sexual actors and initiators. They are aggressive in such ways as to make the best first impression and seem better than the other men.

-                    Emily – female sexual roles: Ward (1995) stated, “A women’s virtue is enhanced by not being sexual.” Going along with Ward, I wouldn't say Emily is necessarily following what is appropriate for her gender role. She swaps spit with multiple of the men like it is her job. For a woman, this is portrayed as promiscuous. A female's sexual role is to also be more passive and set sexual limits. Emily doesn’t really have limits. She basically treats each man like he’s her one and only and seems to be all about the physical. In one episode, she is complaining about how Jef, another contestant, hasn’t kissed her yet and how she is, in a way, disappointed. In another, she also talked about how she can’t keep her hands off of Arie, and all she wants to do is kiss him… kiss him… and kiss him. In its own way, this almost seems as if Emily is being the sexual aggressor in the show.

While the male role, according to Ward, is consistent, it is obvious that the female role… is not so much. However, with that said, while promiscuousness would be seen as acceptable if the tables were turned, I feel the Bachelorette is a nice twist! It is actually nice to see a women having the power, being promiscuous, expressing her sexuality, and taking on what is portrayed as a male role.